Author Archive | Rena Bonesio

two directional signs: one says "same" and the other says "change"

This Blog is Changing

We are changing this blog a little and want to let you know what to expect. We are going from three emails to two emails per week. We’ve gotten a lot of feedback that we send out too many emails. We want to continue providing you plenty of useful information that supports you in making […]

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picture of my little beige tabby cat Calvin

A Reference Experience

A reference experience is something you went through in the past that can help you navigate something your going through now. I recently called on a reference experience and thought I’d share as an encouragement to you to get the most out of your own reference experiences. My little cat Calvin had gotten a lot […]

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Boss from the movie "Office Space"

How to Be a Jerk

OK, you probably don’t really want to be a jerk, but I’m finding that being the opposite of a jerk is really helpful. So what it takes to be a jerk is actually an enlightening inquiry. As I am currently developing a course on how to be the kind of person people respond well to, […]

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Package of Carrot Cake Kisses

Carrot Cake Kisses

“They’re carrot cake Kisses,” the nice lady at the chamber of commerce mixer said as I pulled some candy from the basket on her table. I thought maybe I didn’t hear her correctly. “Excuse me?”I asked. “They’re carrot cake Kisses,” She repeated. I decided to try one for myself. “Hm,” I let out. “That’s interesting.” […]

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Driver's perspective looking through the windshield

You Go Where You Look

“Oops! I didn’t mean to go there,” my eldest son said as he brought the car fully back into our lane. “I was looking over there.” “Yeah,” John answered our son. “You tend to go where you look.” As the teaching and practice with the driver’s permit continues, there are actually some valuable life lessons […]

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A big tabby cat laying on his back

Benefits of Being Vulnerable

That’s the fluffy underside of my cat Hobbes–he’s being vulnerable. He’s assessed that I’m a safe person and that he doesn’t always have to worry about protecting himself when he’s with me. It’s nice to know he trusts me and we’re closer because of it. In fact, there are benefits in being vulnerable in our […]

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email icon

Don’t Email Mad

I once received some excellent advice about sending email. If you’re feeling emotionally  charged and need to send an email, you can write the email but don’t send it right away. Instead, walk away and revisit it after you’ve cooled down. Sending an email when you’re angry, hurt or frustrated can seriously create a mess […]

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"regrets" with a circle and slash

How to Avoid Common Regrets

I recently read something online that listed the “top 37 regrets.” (I’m not sharing the link because there’s a bunch of weirdo ads and rude comments.) I’m guessing that the author didn’t actually do a poll or look at relevant research, but listed his or her own opinion. So, don’t take the list as fact. […]

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blowing up a balloon like breathing life into feelings

When Feelings Become Reality

Our experience of our own feelings can be so intense that it can feel like if we feel it, it must be true. I’ve found, though, that feelings often do not reflect reality. They can easily come from a thought that is an assumption or even a misunderstanding. Feelings come from thoughts. We’re not always […]

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book, "Splash! Increase Your Life's Impact"

Book Do-Over

We released our book, Splash! Increase Your Life’s Impact in July 2014. We did the best we could at the time and it’s really solid. Still, if we had it to do over again, the book would look pretty different. The thing with writing a book is that it can only be a snapshot of […]

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