OK, it may be hard to see empathy is being any kind of weapon. But it most certainly is a very powerful tool. It helps in relationships of all kinds. It can even help us to be far more effective in making our desired, positive impact on the world.
When we use empathy, we are looking at the world through someone else’s eyes. We are able to understand and even feel what that person is feeling. The information we glean through empathy allows us to make better, more productive choices.
With empathy, we can anticipate how other people will feel based on the choices we make. That information can boost positive results we are trying to achieve. Consider the following examples:
When approaching a blind person, consider what it would be like for that person. Would she be able to recognize you by sight? No. Therefore, saying something like, “Hi, Rena, it’s Joe” would alleviate awkwardness in making that connection.
If someone you know has recently experienced a great loss, consider how you would want to be treated if you were in his shoes. Would you really want everyone and their mother to ask how you’re doing? Or would you prefer a simple, “I’m sorry for your loss. I’m available if you would like to talk.”
If you are taking food to some homeless people, how would you want to be treated if you were in their situation? Would you want to know that the folks bringing the food genuinely want to know about you and that they really care about who you are? Wouldn’t that be better than just a quick, “Here you go. Have a sandwich.”
Developing our sense of empathy will help us to connect better with all kinds of people in all kinds of situations. Wouldn’t you agree that it’s a powerful thing when we realize someone really gets us? Empathy goes far beyond any kind of technique we can apply to fixing people. It opens the door that lets us into the lives of other people.
Take some time today to practice your empathy skills. Note to yourself another person’s situation and how they are likely feeling. Choose what to say and do based on this knowledge. Try it with family, coworkers, the clerk at the grocery store, and the waiter next time you eat out.
I think you will be pleased at the difference it will make in your relationships and with all your dealings with people. I’m betting they will be grateful for your effort to have empathy, too.
