Here’s a great way to supercharge your marriage. It’s a little radical and a little different from the norm. But it’s based on our own experience of what really boosted our marriage. Discover your purpose and live your calling–together.
Most self help marriage stuff keeps people focused on the problem. What’s going wrong? What do you want different? How are you going to do it? Are you fulfilled? Are you fulfilling your partner?
The approach I am suggesting is refreshingly different. Instead of focusing only on each other, you create an outward focus. It’s kind of like a classic sci-fi movie where the people of earth are warring against each other. Then an invader from outer space comes. Suddenly the people find they have a common interest together and not just the differences they had been focusing on.
Going on a journey of discovering your purpose and living your calling with your spouse is powerful. It provides meaning beyond just yourselves or just yourselves and your kids. You will find that you can accomplish something great together. You can make a difference together. An added bonus is that the problems that seemed super big seem much smaller when reframed in the bigger picture.
We know from experience that you will come to appreciate your spouse more, including his or her strengths and passions. And you can develop a synergy together. That means you can accomplish more together than you would have separately, even if you combined the separate results.
Once each person has gotten some clarity on his or her purpose, they begin the creative process of combining them to find a calling they can do together. It was a special time in our own marriage when we combined our purposes into one calling. It’s a process we are honored to guide other couples through in our coaching practice.
At a minimum, if you are married and desire to make your life matter more, make sure your spouse is on board. The time spent in discovering your purpose and living your calling would take away from your time and energy with your spouse. He or she should know that upfront. However, if you embark on the journey together that will be time and energy spent together and invested in enriching the relationship.
We hope that you will want to increase your life’s impact together with your spouse. It has proven for us to be a great way to supercharge our own marriage. And we believe it can be a very powerful way for you to supercharge your marriage, too.
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